This article was written for Jen Elliot's Mothering Newsletter:

The Art of Babywearing

I first became interested in babywearing when I was pregnant. I was reading a book by Dr. William Sears (Attachment Parenting) which had an entire chapter dedicated to 'babywearing'. What I read made perfect sense to me, the more I read, the more I knew that when I gave birth I would carry my baby all the time as opposed to turning to swings, bassinets and strollers.

Babies want to be held. Babies that are held cry less. They are close to mother's heartbeat, her smell, her voice and her touch. A baby that is held doesn't have to worry. A baby that is held feels safe and secure. Babies thrive with constant human contact. There are so many wonderful benefits to carrying your baby. Having your little one close enhances parent-baby bonding and it facilitates breastfeeding. Babies are constantly learning while they are being held, looking out at mom's eye level. I often like to put myself in my baby's place; I imagine that someone placed me in a stroller lying flat on my back, looking up at the ceiling. What a difference it is being held at mom's eye level, being able to see the trees, the people, the items on the shelves at the grocery store. It's no surprise that research shows the great benefits in baby's cognitive development when they are held more.

The beauty of babywearing is that you don't have to hold your precious bundle in your arms all day. Instead, baby carriers can be used to secure baby which frees up your hands to cook, clean and run errands. In short, it allows you to meet your babies needs while meeting your own needs to get things done.

I began researching various baby carriers, only to discover that there are so many out there. I was a bit overwhelmed and didn't know what type of carrier to purchase. I would purchase one, try it for a day or two, only to find out that I was unhappy with some part of it, be it versatility, ease of use, comfort etc. and I would return it. I finally realized that looking for a baby carrier that was an all purpose carrier was not going to work for me. Babywearing was something that I was really committed to doing, and so I decided that I would have to invest a bit of time (and maybe money) to make sure that I was able to keep my baby close as much as possible. And so I decided that I would probably need more than just one carrier to use for different occasions.

Wraps:

First I purchased a stretchy wrap made by Mama Kangaroo (very similar to the Moby wrap) and was a bit worried about figuring out how to tie the 5 meters of fabric. However after a few tries (with the help of Youtube and a stuffed toy) it was very simple. I love the versatility of the wrap, I can place my baby in many different positions. I also find the wrap to be extremely comfortable, no back or shoulder pain. This makes the wrap perfect for long walks or getting many chores done around the house. The only drawbacks I have found are that it's not as easy as a sling to take baby in and out, and as my baby became heavier, the stretchy wrap did not have the same support as it did when he was a newborn. So I then invested in a woven wrap. I decided on the Ellaroo wrap, a beautiful wrap made of 100% cotton woven in Guatemala. It's very much like my stretchy wrap, only that it has no stretch and therefore feels very secure and snug even as my baby becomes heavier. I love both my wraps, I love the stretchy comfy feel of my Mama Kangaroo wrap and the supportive feel of my Ellaroo. But it didn't stop there, after more research, I discovered yet another type of wrap. A hybrid. This is a wrap that is a cross between a stretchy and a woven wrap. It has a bit of stretch so that it feels comfortable for you and your baby, but not too stretchy so it works great with your growing baby. So as crazy as it may sound, I bought a third (and hopefully my last) wrap, a Gypsymama Wrapsody Bali Stretch. It's a beautiful wrap and I think it would be great for a newborn and a toddler. If you would like to invest in only one wrap, then I would suggest a hybrid like the Bali Stretch.

Ring Sling:

Next I decided to purchase a ring sling for those times that I wanted to just pop baby in and out easily, mainly if he was fussy and needed to be walked around the house to help him settle before his nap. I also like to use the sling for short walks and light chores around the house, like cooking. I put my four month old in a Kangaroo carry while I chop vegetables and prepare a meal. Now that he has found his toes, he loves the Kangaroo carry because he can play with his feet. Soon he will be able to sit up and so I look forward to doing the hip carry with him in the spring when we go for walks in the park.

I purchased a Maya Wrap which I really enjoy. It's very user friendly, easy to take on and off and has a padded shoulder for extra comfort. Another excellent sling which I have used is the Ollie Golightly ring sling, made here in Canada. It is a beautiful product made of fine organic cotton or nice linen fabric that is so easy to pull through the rings while tightening, yet it is super secure at the same time.

Early on I had purchased a Hotslings pouch and a Mama Kangaroo pouch, but after having a ring sling, if I could go back I would not purchase a pouch. A ring sling does the same thing a pouch does, but it also has more versatility and you can adjust a ring sling to fit you and baby perfectly.

Soft Carrier:

I was given a Baby Trekker by one of my neighbours. I love the Baby Trekker. It's great for very long walks because it is super comfortable, no back pain or shoulder tension. It's similar in comfort to my wrap, only that it snaps on and off very easily. I would wear the Baby Trekker if I went for a long day of shopping, walking or an amusement park. And it folds neatly into a little pouch which makes it great to take with you if you're travelling. It also has 5 different positions for baby and the padding on the shoulders is great.

My little guy absolutely loves facing out, and squirms and cries if he faces in. That is why I had to return the Ergo carrier I bought, even though I liked it very much...he didn't! I have many friends that have the Ergo and they love it, and their babies do not mind facing inward. You can also do a hip carry with the Ergo, which would probably work fine in a few months for my baby boy, but he was too young to try that carry at the time that I purchased it. Who knows I might go back and try it out again when he's a bit older.

I learned during my babywearing journey that babywearing wasn't second nature for me. I needed practice, some encouragement which I was lucky to receive from the many books I read and my wonderful doula, and patience. But like with anything in life, a bit of dedication and commitment reaps many great rewards. I learned that if at first I didn't succeed, I just had to try, try again! I also learned that my aching joints eventually adjust to my growing baby, I just have to make sure to stretch and take good care of my body.

I am still learning and still on my babywearing journey, but I am committed to keeping my little one close as much as I possibly can. I love babywearing, but more importantly my son loves it. He loves being close to mom, looking out at mom's eye level and exploring the world with his insatiable curiosity!

Martha

My Natural Home Birth

Written for Jen's Newsletter:

The Birth Story of Matthew

When my husband, Jason, and I found out I was pregnant we were thrilled. It was my second pregnancy, after having a prevous miscarriage. Our guess date was October 20^th, but I had a feeling he was going to arrive on October 11^th, one year to the day of my miscarriage.

On October 11^th, at 3:30am, my membranes released. When I realized that I was in labor just as I thought I would be on that significant day, I could almost hear my baby telling me that this was the right time for his arrival and that I would finally get to meet him.

During my pregnancy, after a lot of reading and several discussions with my husband, I decided to follow my heart and so I switched from my doctor's care to a midwife practice. I was lucky to be accepted in the midwifery practice, and even luckier to have two wonderful midwives. I also searched for a doula and found one of the best. It was very important to me to have an unmedicated, natural birth at home with supportive, loving people around me. We planned a home birth with a birth pool set up in the nursery. Our birth story unfolded just as we had hoped and planned. It was perfect.

On the morning of October 11^th, soon after my membranes released, I felt the first surge. The surges came quick, and they were quite strong early on in labor. By 8am, my midwife came to our home because my surges were coming every 4 min and lasting for a minute. My baby's head was nice and low, my cervix soft and thin. I just needed time for my cervix to open. My cervix was 2 cm dilated. As the surges came, thoughts came into my head as well. I thought to myself, 'if my cervix is only 2 cm opened with my surges coming quickly and intensely, how will I manage later as I dilate more?' As the thought would rise, I would release it and focus on my breath and the rainbow relaxation CD I had playing from our Hynpobirthing class. I brought my focus back to the present, and relaxed during each surge. I remembered Jennifer's voice from her CD, and I pictured my basket of surges emptying as each surge passed.

At five cm dilated, my midwife Annabelle suggested I get out of the birth pool and walk downstairs and take a short walk outside. Thoughts of resistance came rushing in. I felt this would be too difficult to do. But I dropped the thoughts, looked around me at my wonderful support team, and trusted that a walk is just what I needed. I remember pacing in the driveway, while my husband held my hand. It was during that walk when the mental shift took place within me. I ultimately stopped 'thinking' my way through labor and simply let go. I really surrendered to my surges and trusted wholly in my body, my baby and the process. I just rocked and swayed with each surge, welcoming it, welcoming my baby.

My husband then suggested we put in one of my favorite DVDs, The Cosby Show, which always makes me laugh. I nodded in agreement. Even though my focus was on the surges taking place, I smiled inside at the scene around me - there I was in active labor in my living room, sitting on a birthing stool, with my midwife, doula and husband around me, while we watched an episode of The Cosby Show. I can't remember too much of the episode, but I remember that moment. It was beautiful.

I birthed our precious son Matthew on our bed that evening. I remember Marlene and Annabelle telling me to look down at my baby as he came gently and peacefully into this world. My perineum was completely intact and I felt perfectly healthy immediately following the birth. As I held my baby skin to skin, I felt as if I held the whole world in my hands.

My husband kept telling me how amazingly calm, quiet and focused I was during the entire birth. I am glad that Lisa, my wonderful doula, videotaped the birth. As I watched the video days later, I was able to see what my husband was talking about. I was very calm and quiet. I was so focused on birthing my baby. It was very much like the HypnoBirthing videos we had seen in class. It was the most beautiful, powerful experience of my life. I had surrounded myself with two compassionate, exceptional midwives; a warm-hearted doula; and my incredible husband who supported me unconditionally that day. It was the best birth-day party I have ever attended!!!

Happy Birth Day my darling Matthew.